ryan gosling i think you are at that age where you need to start having children here let me help you with that

(Source: nippleback, via alittledoseoflaughter)

How many times have you heard that, huh? “You’re too young.. you don’t know what you’re doing.. that’s not healthy..” The inconsiderate list goes on. Throughout the years I’ve been dealing with all of those insecurities and expectations about being an adult. I’ve been grown up for longer than i can remember. I was taught to not show love, emotion, or say what is on your mind. Now it has royally fucked me over.

Besides the fact that i can’t find a man that’s trustworthy enough or loyal or not embarrassed to call me his, talking about having trust issues about relationships have made it worse. I’ve been cheated on, hit, sexually abused and much more. I guess what i’m getting at… is i want someone to save my mind. Save my heart. 

I hear from my friends/family that “it’s just not the right guy” or “he’s immature” but every time it’s the same routine. When will it be the right one? That’s what i’m waiting for i guess. I know i shouldn’t waste my time trying to find a man because i’m only 20 years old but do you know what it’s like to be alone? No, i mean completely alone.

My best friend, Marilyn, is the only person who i know that TRULY feels every ounce of my pain. She will always be the one to reel me in and tell me life goes on. And for that, Stubby.. i love you with my everything.

I know, I know. Another pathetic sob story of girly nothingness. But i found someone who i care about. Even though all i hear from his friends, my friends, and even him once, that he doesn’t care about me. I know he does at least a little, and if it’s not the same as me, i’m fine with that. Any single moment of happiness overcomes those lonely days and nights.

You’re moving and i know you will find someone else, and i’ll be here… going through the same thing. The same life. Cause things don’t change. Don’t you dare try to tell me differently.

Don’t feel bad for me, that’s the last thing i want.

My problem is I see the best in people before i see the worst. Even if you show me the worst or treat me that way (even if you don’t think it’s fucked up) i’ll still be there. That’s just me.. always here waiting for something better.

Ok, i lied. I’m not fine being alone. I’m not fine being hurt. I’m just not fine. But at the same time…. i am. Because i have to be fine to keep my heart beating. To keep growing.

A strong woman is one who is able to smile this morning like she wasn’t crying last night. It always rains the hardest on the people who deserve the sun. And i want to live on Mercury so i’m the closest to the sun. Silly fucking request, but i think i deserve the whole fucking sun. I’d get pretty tan too, which i need.

I won’t forget the things that were said. Like, “Don’t worry it’s the prologue.” No matter how stupid that is, i thought it was the most beautiful thing you said to me.

I’ll be seeing you.

nevermindtheboys:

Pierce the Veil will be releasing their new single King For A Day featuring Sleeping With Sirens frontman Kellin Quinn June 5th.

…*hyperventilating* 

wut.

(via whitegurlpr0blemz)